7 Dire Relationship Sins
(and How to Avoid them)!
by Dr. Vesna Grubacevic
Do you wish you could avoid arguments with your partner, family, friends and colleagues? Below, you will discover the 7 dire relationship sins and how to avoid them.
Does your pride prevent you from acknowledging your partner, family members, friends and colleagues, and their success? Are you overly consumed by your own importance/appearance and neglect others? Do you refuse to admit when you are in the wrong? Or do you refuse to seek help when you need it?
You need to learn to let go of the ego and embrace humility. Start to acknowledge and appreciate the little things that other people do. Be prepared to concede when you are in the wrong. Swallow your pride, and ask for help occasionally.
Have your past personal and professional relationship challenges left you feeling angry, bitter and vengeful? Do you over react to your partner, family, friends or colleagues with anger or rage?
Holding onto these past emotions will only lead to arguments and conflict in your current and future relationships. Instead, let go of your anger, bitterness and revenge around wanting to get back at others for what they did or did not do.
Do you excessively think about or physically desire someone else while you are in a relationship? Have your been cheating on your partner/family/friends with your thoughts, emotions or behaviours? Are you desiring better friends, family members or colleagues?
If you are sending out mixed messages to your partner, family or friends they will pick up your indecisiveness, which can lead to arguments. To stop the mixed messages, you need to fully commit to making your existing personal or professional relationships work, and eliminate the inappropriate desire for alternative ones.
Do you strive to keep up appearances and overextend yourself financially? Are you too needy towards other people? This can especially be an issue in relationships where one person was brought up to believe “waste not want not”, while the other did not value things as much as they were growing up.
Reach some agreements around finances and priorities that accommodate both your and your partners’, family member’s, friend’s or colleague’s needs, and then respect these. If you are too needy or desperate for love and attention, address these otherwise you may push other people away with your needy behaviour.
Are you or other people not using their talents fully? Is your partner’s, family member’s, friend’s or colleague’s “laziness” annoying or frustrating you? When one person is driven to pursue their passion and uses their talents fully and the other person is not, it can lead to frustration for both people.
Open and honest communication about each person’s goals, values and priorities is important. If your and other people’s goals and values are different, then you can respect and work with the differences to make the relationship work.
Are you envious of other people’s success and happiness? Do you resent other people’s lifestyle?
Often what we envy in our partner, family member, friend or colleague we lack in ourselves, hence we desire it. Do you believe that you are deserving/worthy of having success and what you want? Are you resentful of yourself for not doing the things you want to do? Let go of these emotions and beliefs, and learn to celebrate your own and other people’s successes.
Does greed prevent you from sharing your time and success with other people? Are you selfishly monopolising your partner’s, family member’s, friend’s or colleague’s time and attention without reciprocating it?
Sit down and discuss your values, priorities and beliefs with the other person. Notice the common ground and any differences. Then agree on how you will effectively work with the differences to create win-wins around time, support and attention.
By implementing the above, you will be able to avoid these 7 dire relationship sins and have the harmonious personal and professional relationships you desire.
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